FMP9–START—-ABOUT SENSE OF SOLITUDE—stories，photography design,
This week, I began to arrange story, I have collected through questionnaire survey and interview I hope in my loneliness can find expression in the story of the story, and I hope through the story to design a gift.This stories are：
Before coming to UK, my girlfriend who has been got along with me for five years broke up with me.She said she can’t wait me too long.
After coming to UK, I downloaded a life simulation game.
I made a small fake girl and looked exactly like my girl friend, I called her the same name as my girlfriend, and put her in the game community.
Then I made a fake myself, and also lived in the game community.I built the house, looked for job, made money, then met her in the park. We feel in love, and get married, then happily lived together,having a lots of kids, and we grow old together .
At last I made a quiet garden in the backyard of my big house, there were we two’s tombstones inside. 「To death with you was my past dream」
When I first came to UK, I went to Sainsbury to buy foods,while on the way home, I accidentally hurt my foot.My ankle suddenly swelled, so I felt angry and painful. I tried to stop a taxi, while I suddenly realized that I haven’t charged the phone fee yet. I felt so helpless,and just stood there for 15 minutes.I started to miss my family and friends, and they asked a thousand million exhort told me to be careful.Thinking about that and looking at the pairs of family and friends on the road, I cried.
After arriving UK, I ran from Common to wharf alone, cried for the strange city and looked the shuttle cars. A tramp told me it was too dangerous to stay on the road, so I sit with him for half an hour. I walked among those luxury shopping malls, looked the festive crowed people, then sloppy walked back to the dormitory. However, I lost sleep and really hated myself being so unreasonable. Things got better after sun rising, I heard bird, and told myself:Be Damn Strong, Be Fucking Strong.
When I first came to UK, I rent a small apartment about ten square meters.
My roommates are a couple, girl is pretty and the boy is good at cooking.They constantly gave me foods and soups, seems that they are very happy. However, we didn’t have too much overlap,basically kept our own life. At beginning, I felt especially lonely,numb living and going to study. My bed was very hard, I told my mom once time, therefore, several days later, my mom let my countrymen who came later than me brought my own quilt.
My roommate helped me accept the delivery, then I came home, took a shower, and felt like sleeping on the cloud after lying on the bed.Haven’t realized exciting, my tears crashed down, while I can’t tell whether I’m too happy or too lonely. In my thought, my past and everything I used to have is no more related to me now, and it seems that I can only catch this quilt, and only the quilt can tolerate me.
Once, I went to KTV with my friends, I drank a lot and felt sleep. When I wake up, I found it was already 2:00am and the whole room left myself.Yet on the TV screen there was famous singer Zhang Guorong’s song ‘so far, so near’.I didn’t know whether my friends are on purpose or not.Outside was rainy, I walked out of KTV with dizzy head and called a taxi, however, I spit before the driver stopping, hence the driver left. Since it wasn’t far away from my apartment, so I walked home,and sobered up. Wet hair;wet cloth;wet mood made me feel desperately lonely and solitude. Looking at the streetlight, I thought I blended in this city, but found that this city never belonged to me.
I bought the ticket to her city, while received her broke-up message at the waiting room.I sit at the waiting room and wait the train supposed to drive to her city. I threw away the ticket and destructively left.
It was my birthday, I invited friends for dinner, it seems that they are so happy and full of laughing, while no one said happy birthday to me.
Before leaving, I silently said to myself:happy birthday to myself.
When I first arrive UK, I even didn’t know the address of take-away food.
This week I also do some design of my photography book，and I try to start to draw my illustrate for my FMP.